Let There Be Love?

liam-gallagher-31

The grown up position to take is to acknowledge that both Liam and Noel Gallagher are pop culture icons, musicians who defined a generation and continue to make music that melts your heart, mind and soul.  The very idea of being “Team Liam” or “Team Noel” should be beneath an adult.  Taking a “side” in a battle between two siblings you don’t actually know is just plain silly.  People who are well rounded human beings know that none of this stuff matters.

Bollocks.

I don’t care if I’m old enough to know better.

I’m going all in on Team Liam.

Liam Gallagher remains the same working class kid from Mancfester who blasted and battered his way into the nations collective consciousness in the 1990’s…profane, passionate, personable and so cool that he could be a back up generator for Iceland.

Think about this…when Liam Gallagher appeared on Celebrity Gogglebox he was sat in a room with his son and his mum.  When Noel Gallagher appeared on Celebrity Gogglebox he was sat in a room with Kate Moss and Naomi Campbell.  Now, you can choose to see that as an attempt by Noel to keep his family out of the limelight…but you’d be wrong, he is a man who collects celebrity mates with the same enthusiasm that I used to collect Panini stickers (still do if I’m being honest).  Like Mick Jagger or Paul McCartney he has decided to fling himself into the world of cosy establishment acceptance…a knighthood can’t be too far off.

When Noel appeared on Desert Island Discs he selected tracks that would create a particular image of himself in the public’s eye…the closest thing he came to a genuinely rebellious choice was the Sex Pistols and they haven’t been off of the Duke of Edinburgh’s iPod since goodness knows when, they’re the punk band your Nanna can enjoy.  Nothing wrong with that…they are a great band, Lydon is a legend and they changed the world but the point is that for Noel it was about ticking a box, not about choosing a record he actually cared about.  He’s safe.  Safer than safe.

Just imagine Liam even being invited onto Desert Island Discs.

Imagining it?

Be good right?

Never gonna happen.

If it does you better believe that he will pick 8 tracks that he would have picked when he was 15.  Team Noel are now saying that shows that Liam is stuck in a rut, a perpetual adolescent, a man-child, incapable of progressing as a person or as an artist.  To which I say two things;

  1.  Good, because that makes him just like me.
  2.  If I want an artist I’ll pop down to the Tate.

Now think about Liam picking a song by U2 on Desert Island Discs.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha U2 ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Nobody likes U2.

Not really.

Noel does though.  Want to know why?  There are 2 reasons, firstly he’s quite boring and so are U2 and secondly he is desperate to be mates with Bono because it makes good marketing sense…being mates with the lead singer of the worlds biggest and blandest band could help you shift a few extra units.

Liam Gallagher has zero interest in being mates with anyone in U2.

That’s a fact.

Do you know what Noel Gallagher was doing when Liam had put a band together and was trying to be someone?  I’ll tell you what he was doing.  He was sitting in a room filled with a fug of hash and moving speakers around for the Inspiral Carpets.  If his little brother hadn’t had the balls to actually put a band together you would never have heard of Noel Gallagher…but I’m willing to wager that Liam would have made his mark in some way, maybe not to Oasis levels but you would have heard his name.

Let’s deal with the Porcelain Modfather now…Mr Paul Weller.  Big mate of Noel.  According to Liam he is just another chancer who is happy to stick the knife into him behind his back.  I have no way of knowing how true that is, or even if it is true, but here is what I do know…Paul Weller hasn’t made a record that anyone other than him really wants to listen to since the needle lifted on side two of “Stanley Road”.  He’s a miserable old sod who has disappeared so far up his own arse that he can carry out his own prostate exam.  You can just see him and Noel working themselves into a frenzy over some rare guitar or an unseen photograph of John Lennon.  Musos mate.  Noodlers not rock and rollers.

Oasis was all about the near deadly combination of Liam and Noel.  They needed each other.  They did what they did because of each other.  It couldn’t have happened with one of them.  It was a perfect moment in British pop history.  We should be grateful for it and for them.

That was then.

For what it’s worth I happen to believe the tale Liam is telling…that Noel was working towards a solo career for a long time, that he is spinning against him and that there are things going on in the background that have forced him to take the position he has on Twitter and in interviews.  That may be naive, it may even be foolish, but when I look and listen carefully I hear an ugly truth from Liam.

Noel is a fine songwriter.

Noel is a funny guy.

Noel is a clever chap.

Undeniable.

But if I offered you a ticket to go and see him tonight or Liam I’m pretty sure which one you would choose…and if you choose the other one I’m not sure that we could ever really be friends.  I’m being melodramatic.  The ideal scenario is to be able to see them both…even more ideal would be to see them both together…but if I have to choose one (and I maintain that I do) then I’m going to choose Liam.

For the fire.

For the honesty.

For the anger.

For the passion.

For the fact that if we ever ended up being mates I wouldn’t have to live in fear of being stuck in a room with Kate bloody Moss and Naomi flippin’ Campbell.

As you were.

2 thoughts on “Let There Be Love?

  1. shit weather tonight in Midlothian and will be shit weather tomorrow . When I am working tomorrow trying to do my job I am going to listen to Oasis! Fuck their brother/artistic – argument/understandings . Good music and it will help me through my day . Sulky boys – great talent !! We need more x

    Like

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